I have a hot and cold relationship with the current liturgical season, Lent. On one hand, the season’s invitation of intentional fasting, almsgiving, and prayer has led to significant instances of self-reflection and change in the past. One year I gave up television and instant messenger after realizing how much time I wasted on dull sitcom reruns and (mostly) superficial online chats; this fasting led to a major shift in my lifestyle long after Easter came and went that year.
On the other hand, I have also frequently viewed Lent as an opportunity to put a religious spin on my attempt at dieting and weight-loss, practices that are rooted in a negative body image rather than a genuine pursuit of holiness.
Knowing both its potentials and its pitfalls, I approach Lent with a lot of intentionality these days. I know that with careful self-reflection and intentional commitments the season can bear great fruits, and without these things it can be a means for self-harm.
Perhaps that’s why I don’t feel so guilty about my Lenten laziness this year. You see, I haven’t fasted from or taken on any discipline I had not already initiated prior to Lent. I have not tithed or given more than I already did. I pray individually and with others at the same frequency too. I haven’t neglected these regular Lenten commitments because I don’t care (come to think of it, the phrase “Lenten laziness” is a little unfair and unfitting for this reason). I have not engaged the season in these ways because I did not make time for sufficient self-reflection before Fat Tuesday. I didn’t want to give up or take on things just because it’s Lent–especially when carelessness has brought negative consequences in the past. I simply had not taken the time to discern which aspects of my life need work in order to connect more with God.
If I was living a mindful life, especially one that reflects my priorities, would it be so difficult to discern the obstacles in my relationship with God? Wouldn’t I know what things I should give up, or which disciplines I should take on during Lent?
If I was living the way I want to, perhaps it wouldn’t be so difficult. But I’m not there right now. Therefore, this year for Lent I am pledging to make time for the self-reflection that was lacking before the liturgical season began. I am asking myself the questions that, had they been a regular part of my life, would’ve enabled me to identify the Lenten disciplines that would most enhance my faith life this year.
With enough self-reflection during this 40 days, I hope that, come Easter, I will have a better sense of what I should fast from, give to, and pray for.
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Peder and I were talking about this yesterday evening. Specifically in regards to the first few verses of Romans 12. message version. Hope you are doing well down south. Reid and Keaton say Hi.